Reflections and Choices
by CaffineLFNDGG
Summary: Okay read the authors note and you'll understand. Deans reflections first. Then it can be T/R or J/R or D/R depending on which chapter you go to so its a please all! ***[COMPLETE]*** Please Read! All Three Versions are UP!
1. Reflecting

Chapter 1: Reflecting  
  
Okay here is the only chapter that just about everyone is going to read, the story will be complete tomorrow or something so read it!  
  
Read on! P.s. the whole chapter is in Dean's thoughts!  
  
************************************************************************  
  
**In Dean's Thoughts**  
  
He loved Rory, right? Yes of course he did, he was madly in love with her, head over heels in love with her. The type of love; which is only portrayed in movies, but this love was real. At times it frightened him how much he loved her. He would never imagined that by the time he was sixteen he would love someone as much as he loved Rory. Of course he had loved her now for two years.  
  
He lived for Rory, he strived on seeing her. Everyday when she stepped off the bus to say hello to him his heart skipped a few beats. He wanted to marry her, to be without her for the rest of his life. He never wanted to hurt her, ever. He knew he was being overprotective lately. But you have to be when your going out with someone like Rory, someone that you love so much, but that other people love also. Yes he knew other people loved Rory. In fact that was the problem.  
  
When he had first gotten together with Rory, she was nervous, she was overly nervous. She had never been kissed, never had a boyfriend, and all of a sudden she had both. And both were from him. He knew that that had scared her a bit. But it had worn off; it had worn off very quickly. He had been fascinated with her the first time he saw her. She was smart, and witty. When he had first saw her, she had been reading a book, she always read books. She looked so peaceful and unaware of everything else that was surrounding her. He had just stood there for what seemed like a second, but what was actually about half an hour, just watching her. Watching her brush her hair away from her face, watching her read with such intent, watching her turn the pages, watching her not notice a thing. She didn't even feel the penetrating, adoring stare that he was covering her with. Eventually Rory had gotten up and walked away, heading home. That was the first time he saw her. Ever since he had been fascinated by her, watching her every move, not wanting to miss a thing.  
  
Dean was enchanted and mesmerized by Rory. On their third anniversary he had told her that he loved her. And he meant those words more then he had meant anything he had ever said before. He had loved her since the moment he set eyes on her, but she obviously didn't feel the same way, because she hadn't told him that she loved him too. He had been heartbroken and confused, the only that he could think of doing was ending it with her. It was too heart breaking to know that his girlfriend that he loved with all his heart and soul didn't love him back. It was the most saddening thing that Dean had ever known.  
  
He had been suspicious of Tristan wanting Rory ever since Rory first started going to Chilton. At first it seemed like Tristan just wanted to get into Rory's pants, and considered her just another conquest. But then Dean had started to notice a change in the way that Tristan viewed Rory. He had started to look at her more longingly, more lovingly. As though he wanted her to be more then a conquest. And Dean had realized, Tristan was head over heels for Rory. Totally in deep love with her. Dean had also noticed a change in Rory. At first he ignored it but then it became too obvious, Rory had started to flirt with Tristan, she would tease him, taunt him, and banter endlessly with him. That's when he started to get protective. Of course according to Rory nothing had happened between them, but they were still acting the same towards each other even after two years. And Tristan hadn't had any of his one-night stands or any other girlfriends since he had been engulfed in his for Rory. Tristan knew it, Dean knew it. But of course, Rory being Rory, she had no clue.  
  
A while after Dean and Rory had broken up he had decided to come surprise her at her school. She had been thrilled to see him. She had flung her arms around his neck and said that she loved him and that she hated Tristan. Dean was overjoyed to hear this, but Tristan wasn't (though he eventually got over it, unfortunately when Rory explained that she didn't actually hate him). Dean and Rory had gotten back together. But ever since they had gotten back together things hadn't been the same as they were before. Dean was still drooling at even the thought of Rory, but she wasn't drooling for him. She was distracted. There weren't the same sparks that there had been earlier on in their relationship. They weren't totally in awe with each other's lives anymore.  
  
Someone up in the sky or something, one of those people in charge must have decided, that no Tristan wasn't enough to distract Rory. Though Tristan may just have been the main reason that Dean and Rory's relationship had broken up a little bit. No the power up there had decided that Rory needed yet another distraction. This distraction was Jess. The second that Dean heard about Jess he started to hate him. Jess was a bad boy, who all the girls seemed to swoon over. Almost immediately Jess had taken notice of Rory. Dean noticed this and snapped into over jealous mode, he had gotten used to Tristan, but here was a new guy, and with both Jess and Tristan who knew how Rory would react. Jess would provoke Rory, make fun of Dean, and try everything in his power to get Rory away from Dean. Of course Rory NEVER noticed, she was an incredibly smart girl, just not too bright about other people's feelings. Rory and Jess had become friends, and at least Rory saw it, as that was all they ever would be. But Jess wanted more and that started to affect Rory, and whether Rory knew it or not, she wanted more too. She flirted with Jess non-stop.  
  
Dean was more confused then anything in the world. He didn't understand where their relationship was headed. Rory was flirting with two other guys who were head over heels in love with her. But she was with Dean, that counted for something right? And she said she loved him. But did she really mean it? That's what Dean wanted to know, did Rory really mean it? He didn't know what to do with their relationship, should it continue, or should he let her go, as painful as it would be for him, should he let her go for one of the other two? He had no idea; any way he turned he knew that it would be painful. But in the end, he believed he would make the right decision.  
  
************************************************************************ Hey so did you like it? I hope you did. Now of course there are two choices, to be with Rory or not to be with Rory. And I don't personally know which one is right (except if it was for Tristan then I think Rory should drop Dean in a second). So you guys get to decide which one you think is right, and read the next and final chapter, which of three final chapters will choose? Lets see! And review please! Thanks!  
  
Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease -Anna 


	2. Its Too Important To Let Go Dean Version

Chapter 2 (Dean version): It's Too Important To Let Go  
  
  
  
Yea so here's the Dean version. The Jess and Tristan version will be out tonight also. So standby for those! Now READ!  
  
************************************************************************  
  
  
  
The bus rolled up to the bus stop. Dean sighed, hoping that everything would work out, he brushed his hair off of his fore head and waited for Rory to come off the bus. He had formed a habit of watching the people that came off the bus before her and making up tiny segments about their lives. An old man came off the bus, then an old woman followed him, he held hands with the old woman and they walked off together. Dean decided that they had been married for forty years, had three grown up children and were happier then ever. He smiled hoping that one day maybe he and Rory would be like that.  
  
Rory was looking out the window at Dean. He was watching the old couple walk off and was smiling. She grinned seeing him. She had been doing a lot of thinking lately and she knew that she was meant to stay with Dean, sure maybe right now Tristan and Jess were distractions. But she knew that if she and Dean could get through this then the could get through anything. Besides she had realized that she truly loved Dean, losing him would destroy her, she wouldn't know how to continue with her life. She'd be left stranded.  
  
When she finally got off the bus she bounded over to Dean. She hugged him tightly, she smiled up at him and he returned her smile. Then she pulled him into the most passionate kiss that they had ever had together. They stood there kissing each other, finding a new side of their relationship, both of them were in ecstacy, knowing that this was right, this was how it was supposed to be, they were in love. The bus pulled away and they were still locked together at the lip. A while later they broke apart, Dean smiled down at Rory and grasped her hand.  
  
"Hello to you too," he said.  
  
Rory blushed and said, "Lets go get coffee." Then she ran off ahead of him.  
  
Dean smiled, knowing that this truly was right, they were going to be together, forever. He loved her with all his heart, and that kiss, that kiss proved that she felt the same way about him and that nothing was changing.  
  
**Three Years Later**  
  
Rory was as giddy as a 7th grader getting ready for her first day of school. She had been in Harvard for two years now, and she had been separated from Dean too much. They had of course stayed together, their love for each other too strong to be broken something such as distance. Dean was coming that night and she wanted to look perfect, he was going to spend the weekend up there with her and that was not something that happened every weekend. They talked on the phone every night and visited each other at least every other week but usually for only a day. Rory looked at herself in the mirror, she was wearing a red spaghetti strap dress that was made of a gauzy material, it had a low square neckline. She had pinned her hair up to the side and let the other side hang down, then she had applied a little blush, a light pink lipgloss, mascara, and a tiny bit of eyeliner. She studied herself deciding that it would have to do and spritzed some of her perfume on.  
  
Meanwhile Dean was only about five minutes away from Harvard. He knew what he was going to do tonight. It was something that he had wanted to do for as long as he could remember. He was aching to do it, to see the response she would give him, to find out if everything would continue, or if the next morning he would feel as though everything had been a dream. He arrived at Harvard, in front of Rory's dorm, he pocketed the little box, got out of the car and walked into the dorm.  
  
Rory heard a knock at the door and she felt butterflies in her stomach. She walked over to the door, and opened it, it revealed Dean (of course) on the other side. She flung her arms around his neck and kissed him hard and lustfully. He responded and for the next ten minutes or so they stood there between the doorway, eating each others faces.  
  
Then he said, "So your happy to see me?"  
  
"No, not really." She said teasingly before kissing him again and whispering seductively, "You know I've missed you."  
  
"Come on lets go, I have to whole evening planned out."  
  
"Okay let me just get my shawl," Rory said, then she went in, grabbed her shawl and closed the door behind her.  
  
The whole way over to the resturant and during dinner they talked, laughed, and gossiped about Stars Hollow. They were having the time of their lives. Dean looked over at Rory, revealing in her beauty, amazed that after all these years, she was still his. He watched her all night long, the way her eyes sparkled, the way she laughed, the way she smiled, and everything else about her.  
  
After dinner Dean led Rory to the car.  
  
"I have a surprise for you," he said.  
  
"Okay."  
  
"But first you have to close your eyes the whole way over there."  
  
"Do I have to?" complained Rory.  
  
"Yes you have to otherwise it won't be the same."  
  
"Fine," she responded, crossing her arms over her chest.  
  
Dean chuckled to himself and then drove off towards the designated destination (sorry it was too good an opportunity to use that to pass up!) which he knew Rory would find spectacular. He pulled into the driveway of the place and said, "Before you open your eyes just promise me you won't get mad or run away or any of that."  
  
"I promise," she said.  
  
"Okay, then you can open your eyes," he said as he put his arm around her.  
  
When Rory opened her eyes she saw that it was a junkyard (if you don't get it its like their third anniversary), she looked around taking it all in and Dean decided to seize the moment for what he had been planning to do that whole night. He reached into his pant pocket and pulled out a little black box, then he held it so that Rory could see it. When she saw she gasped. He popped it open and revealed a slender gold ring with a beautiful diamond centered on it. Then he said, "Rory Gilmore, I have loved you since the moment I set eyes on you. For five years now I have loved you. I want to be with you forever, I can no longer remember what life is like without you. I couldn't imagine ever losing you. Loralei Leigh Gilmore, will you marry me?"  
  
Rory's eyes brimmed with tears and Dean feared that she was about to start to cry so he squeezed her shoulder, then she nodded her head and leaned in and captured him in a passionate kiss, unable to speak. They were both pulled into a whirlwind of emotions, both happier then one could imagine possible.  
  
**The End** (For you Dean Lovers)  
  
************************************************************************ So did you like it? I hope you did! I won't be writing a sequel or a prequel to this because I am not a big Dean person, I love Dean yes and think is adorable and perfect but I am the biggest Trory addict the world has ever known so I end this here. Tell me what you think and if I get enough people begging I may, I MAY do a sequel. Hope you've enjoyed the story! Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease -Anna 


	3. The One Her Heart Belongs To Tristan Ver...

Chapter 2- The One Her Heart Belongs To (Tristan Version)  
  
  
  
Haha sorry all you Dean and Jess lovers but this is probably the best chapter cause I LOVE TRISTAN! Anyways the D and J chapters are good too but not as good and not really written with as much sincerity! So carry on! This is the last chapter for you TRORYS like me! Enjoy the end of the show!  
  
************************************************************************  
  
  
  
**Outside of the Bus Stop**  
  
Dean knew what he had to do. He let a single teardrop fall; it was too hard not to at least one tear fall. He wiped the tear away quickly, hoping that no one had saw it, then he held back all of his other tears that were just begging to come pouring out. This was the last time that he would ever stand here waiting for Rory, the girl he loved more then his own life, it was the last time he would ever stand here waiting for her to come back from Chilton, the last time he would greet her while she was still his girlfriend. The bus rolled up and he felt his heart break into a million pieces, it was devastating, it was something he thought he would never do, and he knew he would regret it for years. Then he took a deep breath and waited for Rory to come off the bus.  
  
Rory looked out the window and saw Dean looking sad, she wondered why. She studied him and thought to herself, 'Why am I still with him. I mean yeah I love him, but I'm not in love with him. I'm in love with Tristan, but Dean will never know that, and neither will Tristan.' Then she sighed and hopped off the bus. She walked over to Dean, she perched her head forward and he leaned down. He closed the gap between their lips and kissed her with sadness, mourning, longing, forgiveness for loving Tristan instead of him, he gave her a kiss that he knew they would both remember for the rest of his life. Then he couldn't stop the tears from rolling down as he kissed her, he knew for sure that it would be their last kiss and he wanted it to last as long as possible and savor it while it lasted.  
  
Rory also realized what the kiss symbolized and she didn't want to admit it. Dean knew, Dean knew she wasn't in love with him anymore, Dean, the Dean she cared about and loved. She kissed him with the same mixtures of emotions; just she was saying I'm sorry. She also wanted the kiss to last to remember it forever; she let a tear slide down her face. When they finally broke apart both of them knew what was going to happen next. Dean saw the tear rolling down Rory's face and he wiped it away with his thumb, then he forced himself to smile at her, he was actually about to break down and sob but he couldn't let Rory know that.  
  
"Your so beautiful, lets go for a walk." He said. He realized that this was going to be the last of a lot of things, the last walk, the last time he said she was so beautiful, it was going to be their last time together, he wanted to scream and sob at the same time but couldn't.  
  
"Okay."  
  
They held hands loosely knowing that if they held on too tight it would be too possessive. They walked in silence for a while, then they came to the bridge. Dean and Rory stood there blocking of the bridge, Dean leaning against the side of it. Dean looked into Rory's eyes for as long as he could, knowing he would remember that face, remember those eyes forever. (I'm sorry people you have to admit it is VERY VERY VERY sad I'm about to cry! Tissue!) Then he sighed, both of his hands still holding both of Rory's hands.  
  
Then he decided it was time to speak. "Rory I love you, you know that."  
  
"I know, I---"  
  
Dean cut her off knowing that Rory didn't mean what she was about to say, "No you don't, you don't love me. You used to but now you don't. We both know the sparks aren't there anymore. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do and the hardest thing I ever will have to do. Rory Gilmore I love you, I'm in love with you, but you're not in love with me. You love me sure, but you're not in love with me."  
  
"Dean I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't be sorry."  
  
"I love you, I honestly do. Its just, well it just is this way. You were my first love, my first kiss. I'll love you forever."  
  
"Rory I'll love you forever too. I'll be in love with you forever. You're the type of girl that holds a guys heart forever, you just don't know it. You're enchanting, majestic. Rory, you love Tristan, go be with Tristan, you should be. We'll be friends we will, we have to be."  
  
"Yes we will."  
  
"I love you Rory," he said, then using all the strength he could he dropped her hands and walked away.  
  
"Wait!" Rory screamed after him. Dean turned around. Rory ran up to him and flung her arms around his neck, hugging him as tight as she could, almost cutting off his air, then she whispered in his ear, "Dean Forster (that's his name right?) I will always love you, always. And I'll always remember you, please remember me." Then she kissed his check for the last time (while they were still caring the same way about each other, you know they kissed on the cheek later on in life when they were friends and yes they will be extremely close friends) and let go of him, she turned her back and walked away.  
  
But not before Dean said, "Rory Gilmore, I will remember you, your impossible to forget. I love you and I will forever, I'll be in love with you forever." Then he too turned around and walked away.  
  
Rory walked back to her house, letting the tears pour down. When she got back to the house, she went into her room (because her mom wasn't home yet) and let the hot salty tears fall down freely, she was crying silently. She lay there crying into her pillow for who knows how long, then the doorbell rang. She was startled at first. Then she got up, brushed away her tears, walked to the door and opened it. Standing on the other side of the door was Tristan.  
  
"Rory," he murmured.  
  
"Hi," she said softly.  
  
"Have you been crying?"  
  
Rory nodded.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"Dean broke up with me."  
  
"What?!?!? Why would he do a stupid thing like that."  
  
"Cause he knows I'm in love with you," Rory whispered.  
  
Tristan stood there shocked, then he swept her up into a passionate kiss, letting her know his every feeling for her.  
  
"I love you too," he said.  
  
Rory smiled, and said, "I've loved you for too long."  
  
Then Tristan came inside, closed the door and they continued the kiss, both of them knowing exactly where it would lead to.  
  
**The End** (For you Tristan fans)  
  
************************************************************************ Yeah so did you like it? Its over! No sequel, no prequel. If you like my writing read my other two stories which will continue and if you don't know what that whole kissing thing was leading to then your and idiot! Thanks for you patience though! I hope you liked it! Review! And if you beg enough I may make a sequel! Haha! Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease -Anna 


	4. Turning To The One Who Is Closest Jess V...

Chapter 2- Turning To The One Whose Closest (Jess Version)  
  
Hey so I'm not a huge Jess fan. Yeah he's incrediabely hott but not meant for Rory in my opinion. I am holding on to Tristan! Yeah Tristan my baby! Hahahaha! This will be fairly short, after all, Jess is my LEST favorite! So anyways just read it! Hahahahahha! BUT HE IS HOTT! Enjoy the last chapter!  
  
Oh and Read the final authors note!  
  
************************************************************************  
  
  
  
**Outside of the Gilmore House**  
  
Dean stepped up the stairs, longing to not have to do what he was about to do. But he knew it was for the best. He knew that it was what Rory wanted, what they both knew was going to have to happen. If they stayed together they would be too unhappy and miserable together. Rory would want to be with Jess. And Dean would want Rory to want to be with him and only him. Of course Dean would always want Rory to want him but she wouldn't, at least she wouldn't again. He groaned dreading what he was going to do, why couldn't relationships be more simple, he didn't want to break up with Rory, his love, his one true love. He knew that he was destined to be with her, but she wasn't destined to be with him. He knocked on the door.  
  
A grinning Loralei flung open the door. She put on a pouty face when she saw the sad and serious face of Dean, "Oh someone's not too happy," she said.  
  
"No I'm not."  
  
"Your going to do it then?" (Loralei knew what he was going to do she thought it was best)  
  
"Yeah, I really don't want to though," he said sighing.  
  
"I don't blame you, I don't want you two to break up, your ten times better then Jess, at least in my mind but we both know that it must happen and that if you didn't do it, that she eventually would and that would cause both of you even more pain."  
  
"Yeah, I know. I'm going to do it."  
  
"Okay kid, but remember I'll always be here for you, even if you aren't goingi out with my baby," said Loralei, almost like a mother. Then she turned around and screamed, "Oh Rory your highness, charming Dean awaits!"  
  
Rory came walking up to the door, "Hey," she said.  
  
"Hey ready to go?"  
  
"Yeah. One second," Rory said, she grabbed her coat and kissed her mom good bye (Dean had told her he had to talk to her).  
  
"Oh sweetie I'm going to Sookie's!" called Loralei after her.  
  
"Okay!"  
  
Dean and Rory walked away from the house in silence, they walked towards the gazebo, a special place for couples. When they sat down at the gazebo, Dean decided to start the painful thing he was about to do.  
  
"Rory, I love you more then my life but we both know whats been happening recently. We both know that nothing has been the same since Jess moved here. Nothing. You aren't as interested in me and the sparks well they were flying before Jess came, but now they've flown out the window (haha no pun intended, my mom says that all the time but I don't technically know what it means). I'll always love you. I want to make that clear. Please remember me Rory, please. And Rory go be with Jess, he's who you have to be with right now, not me. Maybe one day it'll be me again, I hope one day it'll be me again, but for the time being its Jess. I love you Rory," he said.  
  
"I love you too Dean. Thank you though, Thank you." Then she kissed him softly, their last kiss, their last moment together as a couple. "I'll always love you forever Dean. You're my first and nothing can change that. I hope one day we'll be at the same place at the same time ready this time, I hope so Dean, cause I love you, I honestly do. One day we'll be ready to be together but for now its not meant to be. I love you so much!" she said again. Then she kissed him once more, this time with tears running down her face, this time with as much as passion as she could, she loved Dean she really did, she was in love with Dean, but she had to see where things would go with Jess. She truly did believe though that one day she and Dean would be together forever. "Good bye Dean. One day you and me will be together forever, one day we will, and I can't wait till that day comes. But I have to go see what could be now." Then she let go of his hand, not wanting to. She felt the tears rush down and she walked away.  
  
Dean stared after her for awhile. So she felt the same way, she knew they were meant to be, yes for now he would let her go. (Sorry but I love Dean, I mean Jess come on, he ain't marrying material! Dean now he is so Rory and Dean will get married one day but you don't have to know that!) He couldn't watch her anymore, he got up and ran the other way, tears streaming down his face, a very un-Dean like thing to do.  
  
Rory knew where she had to go, she had to go to Jess. She went into the diner and walked up the stairs to the office/apartment. Jess heard her come in and put down his book. He looked up and saw Rory standing there crying.  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"Nothing," she said.  
  
But Jess knew better, he knew that Dean had broken up with her, it showed in her eyes. Then he did the only thing that he thought could possibly fix it. He walked up to her and did what he had wanted to do for months now, he kissed her lightly. She grabbed hold of his kiss and pulled him into a whirlwind. They stood there kissing for god knows how long.  
  
"So you feel the same way," said Jess, jokingly.  
  
"Yes I do," Rory said, then she kissed him again.  
  
************************************************************************ Sorry I couldn't get into it very much but see I felt as though Jess took Tristans place so ya know there was some I hate Jess stuff there. But I like Jess enough! I like DEAN MORE! So this is the final chapter for the Jess stuff. I will not write a sequel or a prequel! Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease -Anna 


	5. The End

Final Authors Note On All Three Versions-  
  
  
  
Hey so I hope you enjoyed this story, it is not COMPLETE! I hope you liked it though! I really do. Its different from others right? I hope so! So review it! If you're a Trory lover or you just want some good ole Trory then read my other story, a new story should be coming out within the next week. Who knows I might eventually write a Dean, but never a Jess! So toodles! Review please! Do you think I should do another story similar to this one? Was this one too short? Not enough chapters? Didn't like the way it ended in any of the chapters? Was it boring and un appealing? Just tell me what you thought about it honestly and constructive criticism is always welcomed!  
  
Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease -Anna  
  
I hope you've enjoyed these!  
  
  
  
  
  
To everyone-  
  
Ok listen up you guys! If you don't like Dean, that's fine by me, I happen to love Dean, so what we're differing in opinion. If you don't like Rory, fine, but you shouldn't be reading Fanfics in the first place. If you think that Loralei is too perky fine but you shouldn't be reading my fan fics. If you don't like Tristan then you DEFINETLY shouldn't be reading my fan fics cause I love him. If you decide to send me hate letters then I've got a problem, don't send me hate letters just cause I don't like Jess the most okay? Don't send me hate letters period got it! Enough with the god damn hate letters! Its just a story! I have my own opinion! To anonymous-I disguist you huh? Yeah well let me BE BLUNT TO YOU! You're a weirdo who really shouldn't read my stuff and you disguist me infact I find you repulsive! So don't you dare send me another hate letter again! And to the others who sent me hate letters fine go ahead do that, I was doing a please all story and trying to at the same time voice my opinion! So bug off if you don't like it! Sorry to all of those who are very nice people which is the majority of you, I just had to get my anger out and get my point across. AND YES TRISTAN, DEAN, AND JESS ARE ALL VERY HOTT! There you happy now?!?  
  
Love, Peace, and Chicken Grease (except not to anonymous!) -Anna 


End file.
